Catch 'em in the act

One of my favorite ways of teaching my kids how to behave is to catch them in the act.  So often, parents will try and preempt good or bad behavior by reminding them before the kids have a chance to show them what they will do.  The goal is to catch them doing the right thing and then give them proper kudos.  If you catch them doing the wrong thing, rightfully correct them or whatever is commensurate with the offense.  But preempting them from making up their own mind will result in a slower learning curve because it lacks the affirmation of postive and negative reinforcement.

The goal is to get children to carry out your wishes when you aren't around, not when you are.  If you want to teach a child to look both ways before crossing the street, tell them a few times and then give them a chance to show you what they will do.  If they look both ways, go give them a high five and tell them how proud you are.  If they don't, go over to them and tell them they need to look for cars and show them what you mean.

When you're sure your child has it down, catch him in the act when he doesn't realize you're looking.  Then give him kudos. More and more, you want to wean your child from having your presence influence his behavior and, rather, cement that it's just what he does.